lady and her husband,who went to the hospital to give birth to their
child, heard of a new technology from the doctor, which would transfer
the labour pain from the mother to the father.
The couple were
both excited and very much in favour of it. The doctor however said
that, to start with, he would transfer only 10% of the pain, as even
that small amount of pain would be too much for the father. They agreed
and the doctor started the transfer.
The father did not show
any signs of pain as the doctor kept increasing the amount of transfer.
The transfer was complete at one stage with 100% pain transferred to the
father. The father was comfortable even at that stage and the mother
delivered the baby. The couple left the hospital with the baby,
literally painless and ecstatic, only to return home and find the
mailman dead on the porch!
little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird
froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying
there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird
lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.
The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy,
and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. Moral of the Story -  Not everyone who s**ts on you is your enemy.  Not everyone who gets you out of s**t is your friend.  And when you're in deep s**t, it's best to keep your mouth shut!