Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Church Bulletins

These wonderful Church Bulletins are alleged to have appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services. Thank God for church ladies with typewriters.
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The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
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The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight:'Searching for Jesus.'
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Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of thosethings not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands
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Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someonewho is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't caremuch about you.
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Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help
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Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obviouspleasure to the congregation.
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For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nurserydownstairs
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Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the helpthey can get.
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rving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. Soends a friendship that began in their school days.
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A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music willfollow.
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At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?'Come early and listen to our choir practice.
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Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of severalnew members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
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Scouts are saving aluminium cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
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Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased personyou want remembered.
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The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment andgracious hostility.
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Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
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The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. Theymay be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
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This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across fromthe Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
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Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies areinvited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.
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The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lendhim their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
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Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use theback door.
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The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Churchbasement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attendthis tragedy
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Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Pleaseuse large double door at the side entrance.
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The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan lastSunday: 'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.'