Never, Never, Ever

Never, Never, Ever... As a parent, I often wonder if I taught my children everything they needed to know to lead a safe and sane life. You know what I mean . . . Don't run with a knife, don't stick beans in your nose, don't lick a frosted piece of metal, etc. But, you know, I think I might have missed this particular piece of advice. However, let's face it, if any of my sons or daughters ever tried this totally idiotic stunt, I figure they are way too stupid to survive in this world anyway!   Never . . ..   Ever . . ..   Ever . . ..   Put a FIRECRACKER   In your ass and light it!  I REPEAT. . .   Never... Ever... Ever,   Put a FIRECRACKER   In your ass & light it ! ! !   .   ..   ..   ..   ..   ..   ..   Now, that's . . . ONE DUMB ASS !